My father

I don't know how to put this
how to translate my feelings towards my father into mundane words

Sometimes just thinking about his life and how unlucky he was makes me on the verge of tears

Being unable to find a job in KSA due to some political reasons back then and the death of his fiancee which gave him a stroke followed by paralysis were sufficient to divert the course of his life

He's a symbol of sacrifice and dedication
He's a serious yet very kind and passionate person
I never heard him singing or watching a movie
before retirement his day was about work and prayers and preaching us
His way was gentle and he never forced us to do anything but he always tried to persuade us

I owe him any success I've achieved -If I've achieved any-
I remember when I was Young most of the time I was afraid that he dies and leaves me
I was very clung to him

And now he's senile and weary
I can't bear watching him suffering from his senility

Maybe my father is not my role-model
Maybe sometimes we disagree

But something remains
I hold for this man a great amount of respect and appreciation
I love him so much

I wish I can repay
But how can I?

He's the reason why I love mathematics and why I entered my college
He's the reason why I am good in English, I will never forget the small notebook that he used to explain to me the basics of grammar and new vocabulary

I am really speechless
I really love this man